Holding Me Together
by Marie S Zachary
Summary: After Willow is kidnapped Jade and Beck rush to get her back in the busy place of NYC.  Will they be too late?  What else will happen?  Plenty.  Read on in this sequal to Broken But Not Destoryed
1. Settling In

I don't Own Victorious

* * *

Jade's point of view

I am so excited. My life is finally going the way that I had imagined. 1Willow, Beck, Cat, Robbie, Sinjin, Tori, Andre, Trina and I are taking a trip to New York now to go see a concert. We will be staying there for 3 weeks. Ever since Beck has replaced Sikowitz school has been a blast and we've been learning a lot.

I will admit that I've been known to take over sometimes. One incident in particular that I can remember is when Beck and I were on a date and I saw a flyer for a show, Miss Saigon, which I really wanted to see. This was the week before the trip. I said, "You know what we should do? We should go see the show… all of us… like a field trip or something like that"

He loved the idea just like he loves all of my ideas. The past few months had been HELL for me. Over the summer I was raped by a guy who had AIDS. Thankfully I was tested negative but I did develop H**P**V which is a disease that caused vaginal cancer. Later I found out my daughter, Willow, (who is really my sister but I've been raising since she was 12 days old) had pancreatic cancer.

After a **horrible **week an angel came to me and offered me the chance to reclaim Willow's health. 'All I had to do' was relive my rape again. It was so worth it. Willow is now a healthy girl of four. You would never know there was ever a problem with her.

We all cheer as the airplane touches down. Beck has hired a limo to take us to the hotel. I gave Willow an ice cream cone in the limo and read to her a story.

"Cinderella," she picked

I groaned to myself but read it anyway.

Willow was pretty much obsessed with Cinderella. Honestly though I was so grateful that Willow was healthy now that Cinderella isn't such a big deal. When we got to the hotel I noticed that RAPUNZEL was playing in the hotel theater.

"Beck," I told him, "You go unpack. I'm going to take Willow to go see RAPUNZEL"

Beck nodded and led everyone else to the room. It was a huge room which was basically dived up into several sub rooms. Willow LOVED the show. I thought I was home free.

Just then the announcement came on that tomorrow at noon there would be a showing of Cinderella.

"Mommy can we go," Willow asked in her sweet voice.

"Um," I said, "Sure"

I wanted to say no but I couldn't. Little did I know this would be the start of another nightmare.

1 I know it was originally supposed to be Philly but this is necessary in order for this story to take place.


	2. Missing

Sinjin's Point of view

"Jade?"

Jade looked up and smiled at me.

"Hey Sinjin," she said

"Um… I was wondering about something. You don't have to say yes but I hope you say yes but you don't have to say yes but I hope you do"

Jade's Point of view

"Sinjin," I said

"Yeah?"

"SHUT UP AND TELL ME WHAT YOU WERE WONDERING ABOUT?"

"Well… since you and Beck wanted to go to dinner tonight and everyone else has plans I was wondering if maybe I could take Willow to the park?"

If he had asked that a month ago I would have thought he was insane.

Sinjin has SINCE matured a lot. He has been responsible for Willow once before.

"Alright," I told him, "but be sure you keep your eye on her and DON'T let her out of your sight, do you understand me"

"I understand," he said

"If **anything **happens to her," I told him, "I swear-"

"Nothing's going to happen," he promised.

"It better not," I told him firmly, "You'll be in **big trouble **if it does"

It was a couple of hours later. Beck and I were finishing dinner and about to start on dessert when Sinjin came in. He looked awful.

"Where's Willow," I asked

"Well you're not going to like this," he said hanging his head, "she's sort of been kidnapped"

Beck's point of view

I swear my heart was pounding so bad a deaf person could hear it. Jade's emotions registered a mix of terror and seething rage.

"I'm calling the cops," she said.

She left to make the call.

"Sinjin what the hell happened," I asked him

"Well Jade said I could take her to the park so I took her to Central park-"

"You took a **4-year-old **to CENTRAL PARK at NIGHT! **ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR FUCKEN MIND," **I screamed at him

Sinjin's point of view

That was probably a mistake on my part. I just thought Central Park would be a little more fun then the regular playground a block away from the hotel.

"I'm sorry," I said, "the guy just took her and ran off. He literally snatched her from my arms"

"You were RESPONSIBLE for her," Beck told me, "You acted irresponsibly and I'm very disappointed in you."

"Are we still friends," I asked him

"DON'T ask me that right now," he told me, "I probably won't answer truthfully"

"I guess I'm in a load of trouble huh?"

"I'll take that bet," Beck replied angrily, "NOW the main thing is finding Willow"

Jade walked back looking all shaken up.

* * *

I'll go into the details along the way. The details are a major part of the story


	3. 24 Hours

Tori's point of view

1"They said she has to be missing for 24 hours," Jade told the rest of us later, "before they will do anything. She could be DEAD by then"

Jade was hysterical.

"THIS IS BULLSHIT," I yelled, "Trina give me your phone"

My phone had died.

Billy's point of view

My phone rang about 8 o'clock at night. I grabbed it and answered seeing it was Trina.

"Hi honey," I said, "How's the trip"

"Willow is missing," Tori told me and told me the story.

"Sit tight," I told her, "and tell Jade and Beck to sit tight… I'm on my way"

I called my partner and had him take my shift.

"I'll see you when you get back," he said

"Yes," I said and then hung up.

I managed to catch an 8:30 plane. I lived **very **close to the airport.

I met up with Jade and Tori and the rest of the gang in the lobby.

"Thank you for listening to me and sitting tight," I said, "I know how badly you want to go out and find her"

"Mr. Vega I'm scared out of my **mind**," Jade said, "that's my daughter in there"

I put a hand on her shoulder.

"I know," I told her gently

I turned to Sinjin.

"Sinjin-"

"Am I under arrest," Sinjin asked

"Of course not," I told him, "I just need some information. Do you have any idea what the guy looked like?"

Sinjin described him very vividly. He was African American with a buzz cut. He had a scar on his upper right shoulder blade that looked like a fig leaf and he was extremely tall.

"That will narrow it down," I said, "I'm going to go talk to my buddies down at the Precinct and get them to open the case. Meanwhile you need to stay put.

"You guys aren't professionals and going looking for her will put her in more danger then she's already in. Jade, I promise that we're going to find her"

I didn't know that for certain. What I knew was that Jade's daughter was missing and I was going to do everything I could to make sure she was found.

"Thank you," Jade said hugging me, "for everything"

Jade has become like a daughter to me. I loved her. I don't let my family down and I sure as hell wasn't going to let Jade down. I just prayed that I wasn't too late.

"I will call you as soon as I get any word at all," I told her

"Please," she begged, "Find her alive"

1 I know it's different in child cases but this needs to be true for this chapter to work


	4. Like A Bridge Over Troubled Water

Jade's point of view

I wanted to beat the hell out of Sinjin but I knew he was already beating himself up emotionally. He needed a friend right now. He was in **big trouble **but he needed to know that he was still loved and cared about.

"Sinjin," I told him, "You know you're in big trouble right?"

He nodded.

"You were **irresponsible **taking her to Central park at that hour of the day. It will be a long time before I can trust you with **anything**again, let alone Willow. You can forget about being included in anything until you earn back that trust as well"

Beck nodded in agreement.

"As much as you screwed up," I told him, "It could have happened to anyone so you **will **have a chance to redeem yourself."

"Are we still friends," he asked

"Yes," Beck and I said at the same time along with everyone else.

"But that doesn't mean you're not in trouble," I added, "You lost trust which means you've lost privileges. Until you can gain back that trust you will not have those privileges."

"So nothing," he asked

Beck looked at me saying _it's your call _with his eyes.

"You can participate in the regular stuff we do but the extras… no. I don't think we'll be doing anything for awhile anyway," I added, "Not until Willow is back"

Beck nodded understanding completely. Nobody was in the mood to do much of anything.

We were all frantic. Willow could be dead right now.

"She's not," Beck whispered to me, "She's going to be alright"

Alright? She's GOD KNOWS WHERE IN NEW YORK CITY WITH A KIDNAPPER.

Suddenly Tori started singing.

_When you're weary_

_Feeling small_

_When tears are in your eyes_

_I will dry them all_

_I'm on your side_

_When times get rough_

_And friends just can't be found_

_Like a bridge over troubled water_

_I will lay me down_

_Like a bridge over troubled water_

_I will lay me down_

_When you're down and out_

_When you're on the street_

_When evening falls so hard_

_I will comfort you_

Beck looked at me and sang the next part.

_I'll take your part_

_When darkness comes_

_And pain is all around_

_Like a bridge over troubled water_

_I will lay me down_

_Like a bridge over troubled water _

_I will lay me down._

I drew in a breath and sang the next part.

I used to sing this song to Willow whenever she was scared or hurting.

_Sail on silver girl_

_Sail on by_

_Your time has come to shine_

_All your dreams are on their way_

_See how they shine_

_If you need a friend_

_I'm sailing right behind_

_Like a bridge over troubled water_

_I will ease your mind_

_Like a bridge over troubled water_

_I will ease your mind._

I would give anything to have Willow in my arms again. I feel so empty without her. I'm terrified that I'll never see her again.

"You know," Trina said, "if Willow dies you can always have another baby"

"WHAT THE FUCK," I yelled, "DO YOU THINK WILLOW IS REPLACEABLE! IF YOUR PARENTS HAD ANOTHER BABY AFTER TRAVIS DIED WOULD THAT MAKE IT ALRIGHT"

"Sorry," she said, "Just trying to help"

"You're not helping," Beck replied.


	5. Feel You All Around Me

Willow's Point of View

I'm scared. The guy who has taken me is really mean. He tells me to shut up and that I'll never see my mommy again. When I cried he hit me really hard. It really hurt.

Billy's Point of view

"Listen Tom," I said to the captain of the precinct, "Willow is only 4 years old. You can't wait twenty-four hours to start the search. She could be dead by then"

Tom sighed.

"I'm asking you as a favor to me"

Tom's point of view

Billy Vega is my friend and my colleague. It wasn't what we would ordinarily do but I felt like I had to do it for Billy's sake.

"Let's open the case," I commanded.

"Sir that's not what's normally done," one of my officers argued.

"This time we're doing it," I said firmly

Willow's point of view

I know my mommy is looking for me. I know my mommy is out there looking for me. I know my mommy will find me. I know my mommy is going to find me. I know my daddy's looking for me too and he will find me too.

Beck's point of view

"I CAN'T STAND THIS," Jade yelled, "all the waiting. Our baby could be dead right now. I just want to find her. I want my daughter back"

"I know," I soothed her, "I want that too"

Willow's point of view

I started singing the song that my mommy taught me.

_When I'm weary_

_Feeling small_

_And tears are in my eyes-_

"_Zip it kid," the guy snapped at me._

"_You're not nice," I sniffled._

_A needle poked me in the neck and before I could whimper I was out cold._

_Jade's point of view_

_ I checked my watch. It was five to twelve. _

"_I'll be back in a little while," I told Beck_

_There was something I had to do. I had to do it for Willow._

_Beck's point of view_

_1__"Sinjin," I told him, "You're in charge."_

_I followed Jade to stop her from going to look for Willow. As much as I wanted to do the same thing doing it would have put Willow in danger. But Jade didn't go to look for Willow. She went into the little theater where a performance of Cinderella was taking place. She had a picture of Willow in her arms._

1 Beck is trying to give Sinjin a chance to feel better about himself.


	6. A New Avenue Credit to Lucky

Jade's point of view

Beck tapped me on the shoulder.

"Jade," he asked gently, "why are you-"

"I promised Willow we would go," I explained, "I'm taping it for her. I'm taping it for her once she gets back"

"Give me the video camera," he said, "I'll tape it"

Willow's point of view

I can hear laughter in my house in my dreams. Mommy was making chocolate pancakes. Daddy was laughing with mommy. I was playing in the playroom. I felt safe and warm and comfortable.

Beck's point of view

Jade was watching the show but she wasn't actually watching it. Her mind was on Willow. That was all she could think about. To be honest, that was all anyone of us could think about. Any conversation we had today and yesterday all came back around to Willow.

Jade's point of view

We were going to meet in the lobby and go out to dinner. I HATED to do that. What if Billy called with information about Willow?

"I'll stay here," Sinjin said, "If Billy calls I will call you first thing"

"Fine," I agreed

Sinjin's point of view

Jade told me I was forgiven. Normally I would have been overjoyed but until we find Willow again, I really don't care. I don't deserve to be forgiven. I deserve to suffer. I took Willow to Central Park.

Jade's point of view

Dr. Phil was in the audience. I guess he must have been doing research for a show or maybe he was just on vacation. Either way I **Had** to talk to him.

"Excuse me, Dr. Phil," I asked

"Um… yeah the last time I checked"

Dr. Phil's Point of view

"My name is Jadelynne August West. My daughter Willow has been kidnapped. I saw you are doing a show on kidnapped children tomorrow. PLEASE put me on the show"

She didn't have to ask twice.

Billy's point of view

We're going to be on Doctor Phil tomorrow. I prayed this would move the search ahead faster. We had to find Willow. We HAD to find Willow alive. I closed my eyes and said a prayer.


	7. The Dr Phil Show

Jade's point of view

I couldn't sleep that night. All I kept thinking is we're one step closer to getting Willow back. I wish it was tomorrow already.

"It's going to be alright Jade," Beck said gently, "We're going to get her back. I'm not going to let you lose her"

Dr. Phil's point of view

"My first guest today actually wasn't supposed to be on the show," I told the audience, "Please welcome Jade West, Beck Oliver, Tori, Trina, Trisha and Billy Vega, Sinjin VanCleef, Cat Valentine, Robbie Shaperio, Rex Powers and the NYPD"

Everyone came out

"Hi," Jade said, "My name is Jade-"

"Yes," I told her, "Take your seat. We'll get to this in a minute"

Jade's point of view

Is he kidding? This is my daughter we're talking about. It's better to get the word out about her sooner so she'll be found quicker. I want my daughter back. I want her back ALIVE and unharmed.

Billy's point of view

"Now," Dr. Phil said, "Willow Candice Marie Sara West was stolen from her mother and father two days ago. Now for a lot of people two days is nothing but when your child is missing, two days can seem like a lifetime."

I know that's true. It was 7 years ago when Trina was taken. She was gone for 2 days and they were the 2 longest days of my life."

Beck's point of view

After what seemed like forever we finally got to talk about Willow. Actually it was Jade that did most of the talking.

"Can you describe Willow," Dr. Phil asked.

"Did you really just ask me if I can describe my daughter! I brought pictures.

Dr. Phil's point of view

I put the pictures up. Then an audience member raised their hand.

"Yes ma'am," I said, "in the green sweater"

"How old were you when you had Willow," the woman asked, "You look pretty young. Are you sure you should be raising her?"

Jade looked like she was about to have the whole barn.

Beck's point of view

"Rachel," I told her, "Just shut up already"

I knew that girl. It was the same person who tried to blame Jade for her rape.

"I think," Doctor Phil said, "that we need to back up. The whole story needs to be told and start from the beginning"

Jade's point of view

We cut to commercial.

"Exactly how is this going to help us find Willow,' I asked

"The more that's out there the more people will be out there looking for Willow"

I nodded. That made sense.


	8. The Story In A Nutshell

Jade's point of view

"Well, I guess the story would begin four years ago. My mom and dad died in an accident when I was 12 years old. Beck's older sister Bethany allowed Willow, Beck and I to move into the RV adjacent to their house. She installed cameras in the RV to make sure we weren't doing the no-no"

I didn't want Willow finding out about sex from watching this show if she saw it.

"Three years later Willow is about to turn four. Beck promised his dad before his dad died that when he turned sixteen he would go into the ATP which is a program that trains kids like himself. The day after he went I was in room 10D, which in our school is both an after school hang out room and the detention room. There was going to be a party in that room and I was helping to set up. There was another man that was in the room named Eli Whiteshell.

"Eli was a student in Hollywood Arts. He seemed nice. I didn't think too much about it. Looks can be deceiving. Eli Whiteshell turned out to be a r a p i s t"

A young man raised his hand and Dr. Phil addressed him.

"Is it possible that Eli is the kidnapper?"

"No," I said, "Eli died last month."

"I think I may know who took her," Robbie said, "I think it was the same person who killed my brother"

"That wouldn't surprise me," Rex said, "That dude is freaky"

"So what happened next?"

"That same summer our teacher, Mr. Sikowitz died and Beck was hired to replace him. When Beck told me the news my response after "Great and I'm so proud of you" was "I am **never **going into room 10D again."

"I wouldn't have done that anyway," Beck said, "I love Jade and I love my friends."

"Anyway," I continued, "We're on a trip right now and Willow was taken"

"It was my fault," Sinjin said, "I took her to Central Park. I was punished for it because I lost my friends"

"No you didn't lose your friends," I said firmly. I didn't want Sinjin to think we wouldn't be his friend anymore. He made a mistake but that didn't mean that he **was **a mistake

"You lost the trust we had in you," I added, "and the privileges that go along with it. You'll have to deal with the ICKY stuff too **probably**, but that doesn't mean that you lost your friends. We're your friends forever. That's not going to change. Do I make myself clear?"

Sinjin nodded.

"I guess I'll never be able to watch Willow again huh"

"Let's find her first," Beck said, "before we worry about whether you can watch her again."

_The day I let him watch her again is the day hell freezes over," I thought to myself but I still nodded in agreement with Beck. _

"Now we're going to take a break and then have some q and a"


	9. Q and A Attack On Sinjin

Sinjin's point of view

"This question is for Sinjin. What were you thinking bringing a four-year-old to Central Park at night?"

"I made a mistake"

"A MISTAKE? You put a child's life in danger"

I let a tear fall down my eye. I knew I had screwed up. I had already been punished enough. I didn't need these people who don't even know me judging me."

"Can we stop picking on Sinjin," Jade said, "This is about finding Willow."

I was grateful to her for sticking up for me. I know I didn't deserve it. I screwed up. If it hadn't been for me Willow would be safe right now. She would be with us.

"If it weren't for this **IDIOT** there wouldn't be a need to be on the show," Rachel said.

"Look," Beck said, "The issue here isn't if Sinjin screwed up or not. We KNOW he screwed up and he paid for his screw up. Our DAUGHTER is missing. Let's get back on the subject."

"Yes LETS," Rachel said, "While we're on the subject what are you doing raising Willow anyway. Aren't you a little young-"

"They provide for her needs," Billy said, "and her wants. She is being raised in a positive and loving environment. There is no concern there"

Rachel glared and muttered whatever.

I groaned. This whole thing was turning into a disaster. Beck squeezes my shoulder in support. He could tell I was scared for Willow.

Without saying a word he told me everything was going to be okay.

"Are you offering a reward for finding Willow," a man in a blue suit asked.

Jade looked like she was going to yell at the guy but Billy answered the question before Jade could respond.

"The NYPD is willing to pay $100,000 to anyone who can find Willow"

I guess he must have talked with the NYPD and confirmed that

That got the ball rolling. I knew anyone who saw that would be willing to cooperate in helping to find Willow. Jade looked a mix of furious and relieved. This is my fault entirely.. I wish I could find Willow and fix all of this. I wouldn't even accept the reward.


	10. Wanted Man

Keegan's point of view

I am a wanted man. I'm wanted for the murder of a six-year-old little boy named Rex Shapiro. There's no way in hell I'm going to be caught kidnapping this little girl. I'll just have to stay one step ahead of everyone else. I will give the little girl a memory loss drink… not enough so she'd forget her mother and father but enough to make her think I'm her uncle and she's taking a trip with me.

Jade's point of view

How can some people be so selfish? I can't believe they're thinking about rewards when my baby is missing. She could be dead by now. How could they think about rewards? It makes me so angry.

Willow's point of view

The man gave me a drink. I didn't actually drink it. I only pretended to since I saw him slip some powder in the drink. After I 'drank it' I 'fell asleep'. When I 'woke up' the man was kinder to me.

James's point of view

I saw Jade pacing the hotel lobby. I met her when Willow was sick and she and I hit it off right away.

"You okay," I asked her.

"MY DAUGHTER IS MISSING," she yelled, "and all people are thinking about is the rewards. They should be trying to find her because she needs to be found not because they can get rewarded for it"

Jade's point of view

"Beck once took a double paddling for you right," James pointed out

"What does that have to do with Willow?"

"I faced the wrath for my girlfriend once," James told me, "My friend was being stupid and I wasn't going to let my girlfriend suffer. Would I have done that for some stranger for no reason? I'd like to say yes but most likely I wouldn't"

James's point of view

She looked at me confused.

"Look the people who may find Willow-"

"May? Oh no! I am NOT going to lose my daughter"

Jade's point of view

"I know how you're feeling right now," said another man.

I looked up and mumbled, "thanks"

"I lost my daughter when she was about your daughter's age. It turned me into a bitter man. I will do everything I can to make sure that doesn't happen to you"

Greg's point of view

When I said that, I saw a look in that girl's eyes. It was sad and at the same time grateful. It was the same look that I saw in Chelsea's face when I told her that even though she couldn't have candy for dinner she could have a huge piece of cake for desert. I wouldn't let another person hurt like I was hurting. I also knew that there wasn't a hell of a lot I could do but for the first time in 12 years… I cared.

* * *

If you regonized some of the characters they were inspired by James Wilson and Greg House from the TV show House. Keegan was my own creation


	11. Unspoken But Understood

Beck's point of view

We all met up at the café to **try **to get something accomplished but the only thing anyone (me included) wanted to do was look for Willow.

"We can't," I reminded them, "Mr. Vega said that we'd be putting her in danger by searching for her. Believe me I want to do so as badly as you do. I thought maybe we could talk about relationships today"

"Sounds like something to talk about anyway," Rex said

Jade's Point of view

"To me the thing about relationships," I said, "is that there are certain rules that are unspoken but understood.""

"Can anyone name some unspoken but understood rules," Beck asked

"Like for example," Robbie said, "You don't say things that you know will irritate your girlfriend or boyfriend or friends"

"WHY ISN'T THE PHONE RINGING," I said irritably, "My baby is missing"

Beck called me down.

Tori's point of view

"Want to hear what I'm going to sing in the hotel talent show," I asked.

"Sure," Beck said.

"It's a song I wrote myself. It's called UNSPOKEN BUT UNDERSTOOD"

"Let's hear it," Beck said smiling.

Andre's point of view

_Unspoken_

_ But understood_

_ Love is everything_

_ Pure and good_

_ When you're in trouble_

_ I will see you through_

_ Love is everything pure and true_

_I swear I don't care that I was a guy, I was crying. Her song was so beautiful. It was almost as beautiful as her. Nothing could compare to her._

_Beck's point of view_

_ "Tori I loved that song," Jade told her, "Willow is everything pure and good"_

"_Jade Willow is going to get through this," Tori assured her._

_I prayed Tori was right. This is one situation I had absolutely no control over. If I had any control over this Willow would be safe, back with us _

_Jade's point of view_

_ I moved onto Beck's lap and he rubbed my neck soothingly._

"_I know another unspoken but understood rule," Sinjin said, "You forgive your friends even when they mess up"_

"_Oh you're forgiven," Beck assured him, "but you still lost your trust and your privileges and I'd say you're in for the long haul"_

_Sinjin pouted._

"_I guess I'll never be watching Willow again," he said._

_Beck's point of view_

_ Jade looked at him like he was nuts._

"_You're damn right you're not going to be watching Willow again," she said, "You got her kidnapped. You took her to Central Park late at night. That wasn't very smart Sinjin. How am I supposed to trust you with her after you did this?"_

Sinjin's point of view

I was on the verge of tears. I know I was getting what I deserved but how was I going to get through this. It was overwhelming and scary. I had to do something. I just didn't know what.


	12. From the diary of Tori Vega

From the diary of Tori Vega

October 10th

Here are the top lessons I learned this year in only one month of school.

I learned that I have friends that I can count on no matter what. A couple of weeks ago I got my visitor totally unexpected in the middle of dinner. I was all messed up. Jade got me back to the RV and actually gave me her clothes to wear when this happened.

I learned that Sinjin is an idiot. I mean come on. WHO TAKES A KID TO CENTRAL PARK LATE AT NIGHT! I kind of feel bad for him that he's in for the long haul but it's not like he didn't have it coming. He got Willow kidnapped.

I learned that we're stronger as a team then we are as individuals. As a team we can talk and share information. As a team we can make each other laugh. As a team we aren't competing with one another. We feel comfortable and relaxed

I learned that Beck is an amazing teacher. He focuses on real life. He doesn't go on and on about things that have no meaning. He has never even assigned one piece of homework or given one test. But I have learned so much more with Beck teaching then with any of the other teachers I ever had.

I learned that I'm a lot stronger then I think I am. I went through a very difficult time once and I thought that I would never be willing to go through that again. Well guess what… if it would bring Willow back I would go through it again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again.

I learned that Jade is actually a good friend. She was a total BITCH to me when we first met but now she's the best friend I could ever imagine having.

I learned that it's possible to speak without saying a word. That was actually one of the first challenges Beck ever gave us. We had to go for an hour without saying a word and only communicating through looks and actions.

I learned that there are more then one way of saying the same thing and tone of voice can make a difference. For instance if I were to say, "You have an x-box?" that would be sending one message across. If instead I were to say, **YOU HAVE AN X-BOX **that would be a completely different statement. If I said it laughing that means it's a joke. If your smiling when you say something it means that there's wiggle room.

I learned how grateful I am that I have my family. Right now the biggest part of Jade's life is missing. Damn this girl has been through hell and back again probably worse then I have.


	13. Give Her A Break

Cat's point of view

I saw Sinjin sitting out in the rain, alone. He looked like he was about to cry. I felt so bad for him. I mean, yeah he made a mistake but he shouldn't be punished for it. I guess I've been partial to him ever since we were in 6th grade.

* * *

((Flashback))

_"Cat, you're late," Skiowitz scolded, "Class started ½ an hour ago. I'm afraid that's not accepted young lady. That will be three week's detention for you"_

_Before Cat could respond Sinjin stepped up and shouted, "THAT'S NOT FAIR!"_

"_Sinjin I suggest you calm down," Sikowitz said_

_"Suggested heard and denied. That's so unfair. Cat has __**never **__been late before. Come on Sikowitz. Give her a break"_

_Sinjin looked like he was about to cry for Cat. He actually was acting like Cat was sentenced to death or something. Suddenly everyone started chanting, "give her a break, give her a break, give her a break, give her a break, give her a break-"_

"_Alright," Sikowitz said, "This is your one 'get out of jail free card Cat"_

"_Yay," she exclaimed_

_"DON'T BE LATE AGAIN," Skiowitz told her, "and if you are at least make an interesting entrance."_

_

* * *

_

((Flashback ends))

Cat's Point of view

I go and sit next to Sinjin and put an arm around him.

"You okay?"

"Am I okay," he repeated slowly, "I haven't been okay since this happen. Cat, Willow could be dead now and it's my entire fault"

"No," I said, "Willow is not dead and if she was it wasn't your fault SInjin.

"It is the fault of the parson who took her."

"I just feel like this is my fault. I don't know how I'm going to get through the tough times"

I squeezed his hand.

"WE are going to get through it Sinjin," I told him, "You're not alone"

\ knew it wasn't going to be easy being in it for the long haul. I also knew there's a difference between tough and impossible. Sinjin is my friend and we would get through this together.

"Cat?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you for being my friend. I really appreciate your friendship"

"I appreciate yours too," I told him, "Now come on. We're going swimming and I SAY YOU'RE COMING TOO"

"Yes ma'am," he said smiling.

* * *

Okay guys I need some imput here. Should Cat hook up with Sinjin or Robbie and why?


	14. Possible Clue?

Beck's point of view

We were going swimming. It was my idea. I figured we could use a distraction from this whole situation and feeling helpless and hopeless that there was absolutely nothing that we could do about it. We weren't allowed to search for her as that would be putting her in danger. We would all take turns manning the phone.

I saw Cat and Sinjin coming.

"Sinjin is joining us," Cat said, "**I say **he's joining us"

"Cat he-"

"Messed up? Yeah we all know he messed up.

"He's been punished enough. He knows he screwed up and he feels HORRIBLE about it. Give him a break. Please. For me"

Jade's point of view

I could never resist when Cat said that.

"He can stay," I said, "but he has a double shift manning the phone and he goes first"

Sinjin's point of view

I hoped that the phone would ring while I was manning the phone. It wouldn't redeem me but it might be a start. I really appreciated Cat standing up for me.

Robbie's point of view

What the hell was Cat doing talking to Sinjin? Sinjin screwed up after all. He deserves to be punished not to have my cat- wait—did I just call her **my **Cat. Oh MY GOD I think I like Cat. DOUBLE OH MY GOD I'm jealous of Sinjin.

Cat's point of view

After about 15 minutes I took over the phone line for Sinjin. He hoped in the pool. The phone rang. I picked it up. It was Rachel, this BITCH from last year who goes to Hollywood Arts.

Rachel's point of view

"You're never going to find her Jade," I said, "and honestly maybe that's a good thing. You're too young to be a mother."

Then I hung up. I'll admit maybe I was being a little harsh but Jade has changed since her rape. I want my old friend back.

Jade's point of view

"Who was it," I asked Cat

"Nobody," Cat said, "It was uh… a wrong number"

"CAT! WHAT IS GOING ON?"

"I wish I knew," she said softly, "I really wish I knew"


	15. That Was Then This Is Now

Jade's point of view

That night I couldn't sleep a wink. I kept thinking about Willow. All the things that I used to think were important didn't matter to me at all. Willow was the only think that mattered. My arms ached with emptiness.

Beck's point of view

Jade is hurting so badly from losing Willow. She reminds me of a glass doll. It's as if she's going to fall apart any minute now. Things were different now.

"We're going to find her," I told Jade firmly, "and we're going to find her alive and unharmed."

Robbie's Point of view

"Rex," I whispered, "Are you as scared as I am?"

"Yeah," he admitted, "I'm as scared as I was the day I was killed. I'm as scared as I am when I'm in that bag"

"I never knew you were afraid of the bag," I said

Right now I was glad he was a puppet because if he wasn't he'd have slapped me upside the head.

Rex's point of view

He never **knew **I was afraid of the bag? For GOD sake I must have told him 20,000 times. Does the boy **ever **listen? I guess maybe he thought I was lyin' but seriously.

"I'm sorry Rex," he said softly

Sinjin's point of view

I wish we would find Willow. I wish I would open my eyes and have it all be a dream. I wish that I could go back in time and stop all of this from happening. I can't do any of that. I feel completely useless and I hate how that feels.

Cat's point of view

Hearing Sinjin cry I knock on the door. He opens the door and he tries to pretend he wasn't crying.

"Sinjin," I told him, "It's going to be okay"

"I just… I feel like a real heal"

"You're not," I told him, "You're just a person who made a mistake and you've been punished for that mistake and you need to forgive yourself."

Tori's point of view

I could hear Sinjin and Cat talking. I know Sinjin's not going to forgive himself any time soon. He wouldn't forgive himself until Willow was found and we knew she was okay. Only after that would Sinjin forgive himself and part of me was glad. He messed up and he deserved to be punished for that but I felt sorry for him… and I think it'd gone too far.

Billy's point of view

Willow has been missing for about 3 days now and Jade and Beck are going crazy. I have a feeling once Willow is found EVERYTHING is going to be child centered because they are not going to let that girl out of their sight. Well that's just fine with me. Let's find Willow first and then we'll worry about anything the future might bring. I refuse to lose Hope.

.


	16. Budding In

Sinjin's point of view

"Tori?"

She looked up.

"Oh hey," she said.

"Can I borrow that big black book," I asked

"Um… it's my dad's," she said handing it to me, "So be very careful"

((Back in Sinjin's Room))

There was one detective that I've heard of that could probably help us find Willow. His name was Adrian Monk. He was the world's greatest detective. If anyone could find Willow on time he would be able to.

I knew that the number had to be in Officer Vega's book. Monk is a detective after all. I know he's married and it wouldn't be fair of me to expect him to- there it is. **Adrian Monk **1 (650) 418-3238. I dialed the number before I lost my nerve.

Adrian's point of view

My cell phone rang at about 9 o'clock at night. I picked it up quietly as to not wake Trudy. She was pregnant… about six weeks along and she was really tired. I had hoped for a boy because B came before G but the amino said girl. She said to think of it as Daughter comes before SON.

"Monk here," I whispered

"Mr. Monk my name is Sinjin…"

He explained the whole story to me.

"I'll take the case," I said.

"Thank you Mr. Monk," he told me, "How much do you charge so I know how much to-"

"If you think I would take a penny," I told him, "You're out of your mind. My wife is pregnant. I know what you must be feeling. Consider this on the house"

I would catch the first flight out for two because there's no way I was going to New York without Trudy.

Cat's point of view

"Sinjin?"

I was sent in to give Sinjin his 'talk'. He opened the door.

"Okay," he said, "Whatever you have to-"

Then I hit him with my lips.

Sinjin's point of view

When our lips parted I felt like I was in heaven.

"In the future," she told me, "We do not take children to Central Park at night. There. Your talk is over. Now lets watch a movie"


	17. Her Great Escape

Jade's point of view

Billy called us down to the lobby at nine o'clock. He didn't sound particularly excited but he sounded kind of happy.

"Maybe they found Willow," I said hopefully

"I'm sure that's it," Beck said not sounding too sure at all.

We went down to the lobby.

Billy's point of view

"Everyone," I said, "I would like you to meet a friend of mine. This is Adrian"

Everyone muttered hello and he smiled at them.

"Hey you're that famous detective guy right," Jade said

"Yes," Adrian laughed, "and I'm here because Sinjin called me and asked if I would mind helping to find Willow-"

Sinjin's point of view

Everyone was looking at me. It seemed like for the first time in a long time they weren't looking at me in anger but proudly.

"Good job Sinjin," Beck said.

"How did you think of that," Jade asked.

"How did you get the number," Rex wanted to know.

\Willow's point of view

"Uncle" Keegan came into the room.

"How's my little girl today," he asked, "Did you sleep well?"

I nodded even though I really didn't sleep well at all. This… thing had me captured here and I missed my mommy and daddy and my cousins and my dog.

"Good," he told me, "I have some good news for you"

Adrian's point of view

Whoever took Willow is definitely not a first timer. It was likely he had a partner in crime as well. He did a great job of covering his tracks but I was going to do a BETTER job of UNCOVERING them. I was leading this investigation now and I wasn't going to fail. Detection is kind of like putting together the pieces of a puzzle.

Sikowitz's point of view

Heaven is supposed to be a place with no cares but the sad fact is that when you see people you love suffering even in heaven you suffer too. Tori, Cat, Trina, Jade, Beck, Andre, Rex, Robbie and Sinjin were my students BUT they were also my friends. In the years that I had been teaching I grew to love them. I wish I could make this right for them but there was no way to do that. How could this be heaven when it feels so much like hell?

Keegan's point of view

DAMN! I'm listening to the radio and the news says that Adrian Monk is on the case. Crap! He's going to catch me for sure. I go to check on the kid but her crib is empty and the window is open.

Willow's point of view

I climbed out of the window when 'uncle' Keegan wasn't looking and I managed to escape. Now I just had to manage to survive until mommy and daddy could find me. I knew they would find me soon. They always did find me. I closed my eyes and prayed.

* * *

The next chapter is going to be totally from Willow's point of view


	18. Lizza Liz Apears Again

Willow's Point of View

It's really dark right now. I'm lost and all alone. Suddenly a woman, maybe a little older then mommy and daddy come up to me.

"Hello sweetheart," she said knelling to my level, "You're Willow aren't you?"

I nod.

"I don't know if you remember me," she said, "but I'm Lizza Liz."

I did remember her.

"Miss Liz," I said throwing my arms around her neck.

"You're a long way away from home sweetheart," she told me, "but we're going to get you back to where you belong."

"Where am I," I asked Miss Liz.

"You're in North Carolina," she told me gently, "Now you wait right here and I'm going to call your mom and dad and let them know that you're safe. I'll put it on speaker so that you can talk to them too"

Thank goodness I was going to get to talk to mommy and daddy. I missed them so much I thought that I would scream. The phone rang.

Cousin Sinjin answered the phone.

"Hello," Lizza said, "This is Lizza Liz. I have some good news for you. Can you please put it on speaker so everyone can hear?"

"Of course," Cousin Sinjin said excitedly.

A second later mommy and daddy came on the phone. It was sooooooooooooooo good to hear their voice.

"Hello," she said, "this is Lizza Liz. Willow is a very bright girl. She managed to escape from her kidnapper."

"Mommy," I said, "I okay now"

Mommy and daddy talked to me for awhile. Mommy told me that she has a surprise for me when I get back.

"I love you Wills," mommy told me.

"I love you too mommy," I said, "and I love you daddy"

Cousin Sinjin sounded like he was crying.

"Cousin Sinjin," I said, "What happened… it wasn't your fault. The bad guy that took me was the one who's fault it was. I love you"

Lizza Liz took the phone and talked to mommy and daddy for a little while.

"I promise," she said, "I will have her returned to you safe and sound. I will call you as soon as possible"

She smiled at me.

"Come on little one," she said after she hung up, "let's go to the store and get you some things you'll need starting with some food for your belly"

She hailed a cab and we were on our way.

* * *

Warning... the next chapter will be a little sad but nothing horrible happens


	19. Not Like Mommy

Lizza Liz's point of view

The first thing we saw was a homeless old man who looked like he was hungry. Willow insisted we stop at a local deli and pick up something for the guy to eat. We got him a grilled cheese sandwich with a side of fries and a fruit salad as well as a bottle of water. Upon learning that the man was only $15.00 away from putting a down payment on an apartment building I handed him fifteen dollars along with a help wanted section of the newspaper to get him started at Willow's insistence. The man's face LIT up.

We continued walking and a little bit further down and we came to a cat who had been run over by a car.

"We can't let the kitty die," Willow told me, "We need to get her to a vet"

We got the cat to the vet where the she was fixed up. The vet gave the kitten to Willow. Willow named her Not like Mommy.

I asked her why she called her Not like Mommy.

"It's after my favorite cartoon," she explained, "The cartoon is called NOT LIKE MOMMY."

Only Willow could come up with a name like that. Finally we reached the mall. We started in the clothing store.

I got Willow a winter jacket because it was really cold. After that I got her some lunch. We went to the toy store after that. She got a ton of toys and books and games. She decided she wanted to donate part of it to a children's hospital.

We got all the stuff she needed and then we went to the children's hospital. I also decided to get her checked out too. There was no physical damage done to her thank goodness because she was smarter then most children her age would be. She didn't drink what was given her by Keegan. We would be heading home after a good night sleep but it would be a long journey.


	20. A Love That Started Back Then, Offstage

Tori's Point of View

Andre and I have officially started going out. Technically we've been a couple since he saved my life. That was a day I will never forget. _I was onstage cleaning up after the show. Andre had stayed after the show to keep me company._

_My shoe must have gotten caught on something sticky because as I lifted it I felt myself falling. I was terrified but Andre caught me in his strong arms. _

"_It's okay Tori," he said soothingly, "You're alright."_

_He made me sit down and he finished cleaning the stage. _

"_Hey Tori," he said softly_

"_What's up?"_

"_I never believed Jade over you," he said, "and I'm sorry if it looked like I did"_

It's weird how things changed so much from those days. Back then Jade and I hated each other. Back then Willow was only a toddler and Jade was raising Willow without living in the RV. She moved into the RV seven days later. Andre was always the one thing that was consistent in my life.

Andre was always on my side. He was never in agreement when people were mean to me. He was always there for me when I needed a shoulder to cry on or a hand to hold. When I was stuck somewhere and freaking out he was the one that was making me laugh. He was the one that was making me feel so much better.

Back then words like rape and cancer and kidnapping weren't in our vocabulary. The only bad thing about room 10D was it was the detention room and even then it actually could be kind of fun sometimes. Of course that was only when Andre and I were stuck in there together but whenever **I **got detention Andre would do something to get himself in there was he could spend time with me. He told me that last night. I thought it was so sweet.

Back then Jade didn't have to pace around going out of her mind wondering where Willow was and if she was alright. This was hard on everyone especially Jade and Beck. It was also really hard on Cat. Willow was Cat's God-daughter. I was there when the conversation took place.

((Flashback))

_"Hey Jade," Cat asked, "I need to ask you something. Um… okay so I was wondering and Tori's here with me to give me confidence but anyway um… so like…. I was wondering if maybe I could be Willow's GODMOTHER. I have red hair and a personality and I love her and I've taken care of her before and I know I would be a-"_

"_CAT," Jade said, "You don't have to give me your resume. Of course you can be Willow's GODMOTHER."_

_Beck nodded in agreement._

All that mattered now was that Willow was coming back. Oh and the fact that Andre and I are officially dating. I'm so excited about that! But man I feel guilty being excited about anything with Willow missing.

* * *

Sorry I took so long to updated this story


	21. A Moment Gone Can Seem Like Forever

Jade's point of view

I remember when Willow was only 2 ½. CPS found out that I was raising her and only a teenager and the head of the committee wanted to take her from me. Cat was there and she went ballistic. I will never forget her words as long as I live. She stared that woman down and said, "Now **you **listen to **me **lady, Jade may only be a teenager but this girl absolutely **loves **Willow.

"EVERY ONE OF WILLOW'S NEEDS are being provided for. She has food. She has shelter and most importantly she has love and if you even **think **about taking her away from Jade you're not only taking **Willow **away from Jade you're also taking **Jade **away from Willow. I won't let you take Jade away from Willow. Willow **needs **Jade and **Jade **needs **Willow **so **BACK OFF**!"

I swear I thought I was going to do a double take. CAT was always a shy, sensitive type. Everyone was always REALLY careful with her feelings. I have never seen her go off like this before. They backed off after a lot of checking up on me they were finally convinced I wasn't a 'total screw-up'… their words.

But I lost Willow anyway. I would have her back soon but a moment when you're missing someone you love can seem like forever. She's been gone for a week and that's one less week that I have with her. Beck slid his arm around me.

"Jade," he told me gently, "It's gonna be alright."

Cat's point of view

Sinjin and I had dinner together tonight.

"I'm so excited," I told him, "Willow's coming back"

"I know," Sinjin said happily, "Do you think I'll ever be allowed to see her again"

"See her… absolutely," I told him, "Be alone with her… I highly doubt that"

It was probably uncalled for on my part but I didn't want him to get his hopes up with that.

Jade had forgiven him but she was not likely to trust him again. GOD I hoped this wasn't going to turn into some huge disaster. I wasn't stupid and I knew it very well could. This could be a disaster in so many ways but I KNOW that we were going to win.

Billy's point of view

I got a phone call today from my pain in the ass colleague at CPS.

"Do you really think," she asked me, "That after this last incident that Jade and Beck are qualified to raise Willow?"

I took a breath to control my anger.

"I think," I told her, "that you should be focusing on people who **really **aren't fit to raise their children not the two best damn parents ever. Jade West and Beck Oliver are the two best parents ever.

"I'll tell you one better," I said, "Beck's last name is Oliver. Willow's middle name is Olivia. Jade and Beck are getting married. BECK has chosen to take Jade name so that Willow won't be made fun of in school for her middle name and her last name sounding alike. BACK THE HELL OFF"

"Fine," she said snoopily, "I was just asking"


	22. Of Course You Will

Sinjin's point of view

_The first time I ever watched Willow Cat was originally babysitting. She fell and broke her ankle. Robbie took her to the hospital and since I didn't have my driver's license I volunteered to watch Willow. Robbie and Cat agreed to the plan. Jade and Beck came home to find Willow asleep in my arms._

_"I didn't do anything stupid," I whispered as to not wake the baby up._

_"Um—congratulations," Jade said._

_"Not to be rude," Beck said, "But what's going on?"_

_"Cat broke her ankle," I explained, "Robbie took her to the hospital and so—I um- I didn't do anything stupid or anything"_

_"Relax Sinjin," Jade said, "I can see that you're doing a wonderful job with her. Look I can see that she likes you"_

_"How can you tell?"_

_"She never smiles in her sleep unless she likes a person"_

((Flashback ends))

"Sinjin?"

I looked up.

"You okay," Jade asked.

"Not really," Sinjin said, "I feel like an idiot"

"Don't," she said gently placing a hand on my shoulder, "You made a mistake. That doesn't make you an idiot"

"I'll never be trusted with her again," I said

What Jade said next really surprised me!

"Of course you will," she said, "You screwed up big time but I know that you'll never make that same mistake again. You're one of the smartest people I know. Beck and I talked this over and you'll be allowed to watch her again WITH supervision of course. It will be awhile before I can trust you alone with Willow. You'll have to prove yourself before you can be alone with her without supervision after what happened this week but that will come in time."

I swear I thought my jaw would drop. I assumed my days of being trusted were over. I assumed I had screwed up so badly I could never be forgiven and yet that wasn't the case. A shiver ran up my spine thinking about that.

"I don't deserve friends that are as wonderful as you guys are."

"That's stupid," Jade told me, "Real friends aren't conditional. Do you think Beck only loves me when I don't screw up?"

I shook my head.

"Beck loves you all the time," I said

"And WE as your friends love YOU all the time even when you do screw up"


	23. Finally Reunited

((This is the last chapter of Holding Me Together but I'm starting the next story right after so you need not worry. Please note everyone is in the same room at that point. Also in the next story Robbie and Cat are going to start dating))

Jade's point of view

It was 3 o'clock in the morning when I heard a loud and furious knocking at my door. Beck and I both jumped up startled wondering what it could be. Instantly I thought of Willow and my heart pounded in my chest. I said a silent prayer as Beck went to answer the door. It was Liza Liz and she had my baby in her arms.

Beck's point of view

There are moments in your life when you feel every emotion you possibly can feel. That was what was going through my mind right now. I had my little girl back and that was what was important. Right now I wasn't an equal or a leader. Right now I was a father and Jade and I reached for her at the same time making a Willow sandwich.

Tori's point of view

Thank GOD Willow was back. Willow being back is like air being restored to the lungs. For Jade and Beck—well it obviously set them free. I waited **what I thought **was an appropriate amount of time and engulfed her into a huge hug. That was when we noticed the kitten.

Willow's point of view

"Her name is NLM after my favorite cartoon," I said

Mommy and daddy looked at each other then mommy said, "She's really cute baby"

"Please can I keep her," I asked, "I love her"

Mommy and daddy looked at each other again and I really hoped they said yes. They talked quietly to one another.

Beck's point of view

"Beck," Jade whispered, "You're allergic to cats"

"That's okay," I said, "I'll just get allergy shots"

Jade looked at me like I was a combination of GOD and her knight in shinning armor.

"Jade," I said in a whisper, "Right now more then ever I would do anything for that little girl. I always knew I loved her but now I know just how much I love her."

Cat's point of view

Jade smiled tenderly at Willow.

"Of course," she said, "You can keep NLM. She's like your baby and I would never expect you to give up your baby."

"I love you mommy," Willow said burying her head in Jade's chest.

Sinjin put his arm around me.

Sinjin's point of view

Suddenly Willow looked up and hugged me. I lifted her up into my arms.

"Don't be mad at yourself cousin Sinjin," she said, "You're a great person and I love you"

Willow was extraordinary. It made me feel so much better knowing that she was alright.

Jade's point of view

Willow was the glue that held me together and she didn't even know it. I wrapped her in my arms protectively. I loved my little girl like I loved the air I breathed. I said it before and I'll say it again. Finally my life was right.


End file.
